Clean Room Book 3: Waiting For The Stars To Fall (#13-18)

"Fuck, oh fuck.  We're stuck here" - Chloe

Ah once again apologies for a late posting, been tech apocalypse for me lately.  Got the scanner working again, the laptop remains at the menders, anyway we wrap up this ladies month with a story by Gail Simone the final six isues of what promised to be season one of Clean Room, so apparently it's not gone for good except nothing bar a single tweet from Jan 2017 said Clean Room would be back.  This is a complex tale which revolves around two very different women.  The first is Astrid Mueller, when she was a young girl she had an accident that ever since has allowed her to see monsters that are disguised as people or living inside them or attached to them.  When she grew up she formed a Scientology style cult with the revelation of what lies out there given to those who attain the highest echelon.  The second woman involved is Chloe Pierce, whose boyfriend was a member of Astrid's organisation and killed himself up learning the awful truth.  At first Chloe was determined to figure out what the scam was being performed by Astrid but she gradually found herself part of Astrid's world.  One way is that she too can shape the visions of the titular Clean Room where patients of counselled about the terrifying thoughts and visions he creatures are giving them as Astrid manifests the beings inside there.  But last volume, Astrid was nearly assassinated by her brother Peter, Chloe is able to heal her via a friendly one of the aliens called Spark, who also saved  Chloe from the ministrations of The Butcher back in her home as well. The last book ended with two of Astrid's "rooks" implicated in the assassination attempt and Astrid looking at her baby niece and seeing a monster instead.  That's the most important stuff that happened, but these books really are cramful of events also you might notice that the main artist is no longer Jon Davis-Hunt but Walter Geovani, more thoughts on that in the conclusion.  Anyway, lets be getting along.

We start with a chubby middle-aged man called Mr. Tubbins being dropped off by a mountain path where he carries a briefcase to a muscular young man called Mr. Webber.  Tubbin's shows a picture of the mutated creature that is Astrid's neice.  When Tubbins tells Webber who the aunt is, Webber thanks him and tells him to do the right thing and as Tubbins throws himself off the cliff, Webber ponders the existance of "a child."  Then we get a full page of his face in which the left side is horrificially mutilated.

Back at Astrid's HQ, The Honest World Foundation in Chicago, Duncan and Killian the two Rooks who betrayed Astrid are called in to see her in The Room.  Both are forced to wear uniforms that newbies wear, and when confronted by Astrid, she quietly demands to know if they know what they have done.  When they tell her why, Ducan saying he wanted to save his boyfriend from "unimaginable torture" while Killian says they let the entity go free because he saved them:

Astrid: "No.  The answer is that you betrayed me."

She contemplates how to punish them and demands to know their worst memory.  Duncan says the first man who ever loved him was killed by a snipers bullet in Afghanistan, he had to as him off him.  Killian says it was discovering her mother dead from ovarian cancer aged fice.  Astrid stalks out leaving them in the room saying they are going to relive those moments.  But she can't go through with it and runs back into the room, she hugs them both saying "forgive me. Forgive me."

Astrid apologises to Killian and Duncan.

She pulls back and recovers her composure and tells them they are on probation, their previous loyalty and service has been more than adequate.  Io her assisstant is surprised, she's never seen Astrid apologise to anyone.  After checking out some potential new Rooks none of which measure up,  we cut to Chloe having a barbecue with the three Haverlin brothers who are her neighbours and Avil her new boyfriend.  They clink beer bottles and drink to "loyal trustworthy friends."

Then Astrid shows up with Io and Capone.  Chloe reacts badly to seeing her saying she has brought nothing "but death and misery to my life" so she should get lost.  But the Haverlins say she isn't being neighbourly and that everyone is invited to their cookout.  Astrid cautiously asks "I'd like a wiener please, kind sir".  When Io says she'll get her some water, Astrid says in fact she'll have a beer.

The two women with her are amazed because they have only ever seen Astrid do things like eat crackers with a knife and fork.   Astrid sits down and apologises for the interupting, she says Chloe has a nice life:

Astrid: "What you said about pain all around.  That is the cost, Chloe.  That is the cost of having your eyes opened.  I can't close my eyes again.  Can you?"

She goes on to say she has one friend in her life.  Her name is Anika from New Mexico.  The beings took her up at age seveteen and experimented on her for amusement.  Now her right side is that of a young woman and her left side that of a one hundred year old crone.  "No reason.  No motive.  They did it to be mean.  A lifetime of pain, waking up each day wanting to die.  It made them laugh".

Astrid attends the barbecue.

Chloe asks her why she is here now and Astrid asks her to come and be her Rook, "you have gifts they do not.  Come help me save the world." Chloe stammers that she can't leave the life she has here.  Astrid says she'll give the life she has purpose.  Chloe says will she answer her questions.  When Astrid says she'd have to be cautious about that, Chloe gets angry and straight out demands to know who the entities are.

Astrid pauses then lets out what she knows.  The entities come from another place, she isn't sure if it's another dimension, galaxy or even hell itself. But they have been here a very long time. Earth is a distant outpost, "their devil's island."  The entities they send here are the outcasts of their species, the sadists, the torturers and the rapists.  Their culture has no death penalty and so they are sent here where they can live without supervision, "because we are no sufficiently advanced to matter."

Chloe asks why they bother if they are so advanced, and Astrid says thet are bored, "thousands of years in a lightless cave, only us to torment.  Waiting for something."  She exhorts Chloe again to come with her and she'll show her what they've waited for.

We cut to the Clean Room. Inside is Astrid and Chloe and a baby of around a year old.  Astrid asks Chloe what she sees and Chloe says she sees a beautiful little girl.  Astrid addresses the child asking if she has something she wants to say to her?  The baby erupts into a monstrous being hurling threats and obscentities at her finally says "we're coming.  We're all coming, bitch monkey!"  Then it mentally forces the guard with them to shoot himself in the head before saying to Chloe, "Philip says hello". Philip being her dead fiancee's name.

Chloe meets hell baby Derica.

Outside the institute, a skinny man with long hair dyed like Astrid's and a pink T-shirt with "#1 Astrid Mueller Fan" on it holding a bunch of balloons with Astrid's face on them is trying to get into the building.  He is being rebuffed for not having an appointment but he says it's important she talk to him because he's her number one fan.

Back in the Clean Room, Astrid is her usual unflappable self while Chloe is freaking out at what the baby is telling them, that they plan to make a bridge out of humans.  She thinks to herself:

Chloe: "Just one time I wanted to be Lois Lane.  I just wanted to do important work.  Reveal the kind of massive truths that could actually help people.  I didn't want to see any deeper than that.  Not really.  Fuck me.  Too late.  Too late."

We get a lovely double page spread of said human-bridge with the baby saying they'll walk on their faces wearing shoes with nails in all the way home "and there are so many of us, Astrid. So many."

Red Flag! Red Flag!

Chloe demands to know why they hate humans so much, humans are already scared of them so what does this achieve?  The baby holds up a brick and says "because the cow goes moo, Chloe."  Then it tells her she was pregnant when her fiancee killed himself, and her baby is dead now "while a monster like me lives to do the most awful things".  Chloe finally now realises how Philip, who had seen so much brutality in Afghanistan and Iraq was unable to continue his life after finding out the truth behind the monsters, "I see it now, humanity gone, everything good in ashes and fire."

Then the hell baby causes the dead guard to rise up and start speaking with Philip's voice as it mocks Chloe.  Astrid decides it's time to put an end to this for now and orders a  "damn" big shockwave to be sent through the child monster knocking it out.  Astrid puts out a comforting hand to Chloe who suddenly notes she hadn't heard Astrid use a curse word before, "I think you were worried" she smiles at her.  Then she tells Astrid to repeat after her, "Fuck. Shit. Dick."  Astrid manages to say "Intercourse. Feaces. Thingie" and they embrace.

Derica gets zapped.

Chloe kisses her on the cheek and thanks her for shutting the hell baby up, "that's the nicest thing anyone's ever done for me. Maybe for anyone."  Astrid orders the hell baby to be taken back to the catacombs as it won't be out cold for long.  Then she is informed about the #1 Fan. His name is Artus Greenhand and he is obssessed with her.  He is in the "watch out for" file.  He maintains a website full of weird fanfic of him and Astrid being soul mates.  Astrid says she has no time for a deluded fan, but he knows about the child and he knows how to kill it, "but he says time is running out."

Astrid decides to get Chloe to evaluate Artus.  Chloe is the only other person who can bend the room to her will and Astrid is needed elsewhere.  Reluctantly Chloe agrees and takes Killian as her Rook to help her:

Chloe: "No more slacking on the job Killian.  You and I are going to fuck these space hemorrhoids up."

Inside the room, Chloe plants a big kiss on Killian's lips (Killian is a lesbian with a huge crush on Chloe).  Having done so she feels more confident while Killian is left somewhat weak at the knees "you could kill a girl with lips like that" she says.  Then Artus is led inside, his hands double cuffed, and he calls them "critters."

Chloe smooches with Killian.

Meanwhile Astrid is at the Institute Sick Bay where her brother Peter is securely strapped to the bed. He wakes with a start, and Astrid says she needs to ask him about Derica, the name of his neice the hell baby. He rages that she must keep her hands of her, that she is normal and fine.  Astrid says she is not and he knows she is not and he is going to help her figure out how to "kill her and burn the ashes".

Inside the Clean Room Artus is getting overwhelmed about being close to things Astrid has touched. He says he was expecting to be questioned by her, but Chloe says she is doing it so what does he know and how does he know it?  He says he is a hunter but one day:

Artus: "I got scratched  Dinged up right fierce. Almost bled out, right there. Since then, well I bin havin' all kinda revelations."

He says he can show them, so Chloe uses her ability and the Clean Room transforms.  To show a woman bound to a chair and gagged with lots of red haired wigs behind her.  Artus is seems is a serial killer of prostitutes, "they're just women.  Loose women.  Critters is what they are."

Then the Artus of the vision comes into the room with clippers ready to shave the woman.  Killian says they aren't ready to see this and to take them back.  But Chloe says they have to stick it out to find out what he knows about the child.  So vision Artus shaves the woman's head and staples a red wig to her scalp.  Chloe can't take his enjoyment anymore and punches real Artus then kicks him in the head when he is downed.

Artus gets a well deserved pwning.

Killian notes that's not how Astrid would have handled it, but she says "I heartily endorse your methods." Artus says he had a vision of the babe and how to destroy her, but he sees how it is.  Meanwhile Peter has admitted the terrible truth behind Derica, he joined an organisation which he thought was good and kind.  But they were all literally fucked by the aliens because they thought they were chosen ones. And Derica was born.

Back in the Clean Room real Artus rises saying he won't help them now and he's felt the room calling since he walked inside.   So he takes control of the room and going home and leaving them trapped inside with the vision version of himself which can now see Chloe and Killian who points a gun at them saying "well, well, well.  Lookie what we have here.  Critters."

We then take some time out for a look at how Astrid's organisation genuinely helps people in need, art by Sanya Anwar.  We see a man and a woman attending Trinity College.  The woman is reading a biography of Lewis Carroll, the man comes and flirts with her and when she says she never reads fiction he hands her Astrid Mueller's book then they go for a pint.  We get a whirlwind of images showing them together including getting married then we see her alone in bed "years later I knew what it meant to be bereft.  To be alone in a strange place".

Suddenly she hears her husband Ian calling her name, "Mary" and she sees him come into the room missing half a leg and with a smashed open skull, "and then I started screaming and forgot to stop, somehow."  She keeps seeing him again in her daily life, unable to let him go because he keeps coming back. She tried to read Astrid's novel which is three hundred words with no punctuation, "legend was that if you read it all, you gained tremendous personal power or went insane."  She decides it's not for her and gets Astrid's new book.

She also goes to therapy, "because this morning, in the shower? Ian handed me the soap".  Her therapist says it's grief related psychosis, her brain is putting him in places he used to be.  But Ian is standing behind her, and he's never been in this place before.  She gets prescribed anti-depressants. 

She loses her job and nearly loses her mind when she sees a meeting of the Honest World Foundation taking place.  She goes inside and they treat her with kindness immediately.  Ian appears and says he doesn't like this place, he sounds afraid like she'll abandon him despite that being exactly what she wants to do.

Mary is special!  Honest!

She sits in a one-on-one with a handsome young man.  He asks her some questions before hitting her with asking her if she has thought of fucking him since she came into the room.   She finally admits "a little".  He says that's fine and continues asking her innocuous questions mixed with personal ones.  Finally he checks her evaluation and is surprised and brings in some others.  Then he goes to her and says she has "unlimited potential.  Mary you could change the world."

Mary: "They looked at me and saw me for what I really am.  What I could be.  I couldn't wait to go through the adept program".

She journeys to the organisation's HQ catching Chloe leaving in a fury which happened in volume one.   Inside she is shown to a dorm room.  She is ordered aroun by a Rook called Terry but Astrid comes in and says to go easy on her as it's her first day.

Mary tells Astrid that she changed her life, Astrid gives her a long look then says she is glad.  Then she says she is there to achieve her potential and "enjoy your new life Mary". She attends meetings everyday, does visible volunteer work, hand out Astrid's books in the street a lot of which are taken by the homeless for warmth.  She is a "stone cold believer" by now.

When they hear one of their group is being made a Pawn, everyone celebrates.  But when he comes back to the dorm that night he doesn't smile and cries all night. Next morning he's gone and they weren't supposed to speak his name again.   Then she is told she is to do be an assisstant Eval technician.  They must listen to the person then say that the eval can't be right, then get a senior supervisory adherant and speak to them quietly then tell the person, "we've never seen a reading like yours.  It's off the scale.  Never even heard of one like this" and they then finish by saying they have unlimited potential and can change the world.

This reveal upsets Mary a lot and she starts crying often too.  Then she is called to meet Astrid and her new second-in-command.  She goes into the Clean Room and meets Astrid and Chloe.  She tries to explain herself but Astrid says it doesn't matter, she says Mary has been lying and time to see what it was all about.

The Clean Room changes to a bridge her husband died bungie jumping off, "the bereft day" Mary calls it.  As they look upon Ian and Mary about to jump Astrid tells Mary that Ian suffered from depression, delusions and more.  "His good natured spirit covered worlds of pain" she says.   Ian tells Mary that he's cut both of their lines so it will look like they were irresponsible "it's the only way Mary. The only way out".

Illusiory Ian jumps, but Mary doesn't.  Astrid says that was the only time she didn't follow him.  Real Mary says she should have jumped too.   They look upon Ian's broken body and Astrid says he wanted away from life that badly. "You can owe allegiance to love, Mary.  But this is not that" Astrid tells her.  Then she says she spoke to Ian, and he told her he's glad she didn't jump, "he wants you to be happy.  He wants you to be free."

Mary faces her worst day.

Mary jumps up mentally thanking God for bringing her Astrid Mueller. Astrid tells her to say goodbye and tommorrow they will find her a new place in her organisation. As Mary cradles Ian's body, Chloe says to Astrid she can't speak to the dead.  Astrid says she lied.

Astrid: "A kind person was being quietly destroyed by something that wasn't even remotely her doing.  Don't you wsh someone had cared enough to done that for us?"

And that ends this interlude with Mary making her peace over Ian's death.

We start the next chapter with Chloe talking with Philip outside their house.  He says beer, hot scary lovemaking and looking at the sun coming up, "it's never going to be anything better than this".  Chloe says he doesn't know that, he says if Astrid Mueller's right... but she cuts him off saying  can't he shut up about that woman and enjoy the moment?  He says her message seems to be enjoy what you have and make the most of every moment, but...

Philip: "Shame  I'm just the ghost of a memory and you're about to be shaved and slaughtered with a bad wig stapled onto your head. 'nother beer?"

And we return to Killian and Chloe trapped with the memory of Artus in his killing basement.  Killian says she thought the Clean Room showed memories not "timey-wimey bullshit" and she moves to take down Artus.  But Chloe tells her she saw someone attack Astrid with a knife in the Clean Room and when it became reality again she was still bleeding, "I don't know if it's a dream or what.  But dead is dead either way".  And Artus grins.

Elsewhere Astrid is visiting hell baby Derica.  The crib is wired up so "let's try and keep this civil."  Derica stands up and says she smelled Astrid's "stinkwater" as soon as she walked in.  Derica offers to show Astrid love and acceptance.  Astrid says she likes being alone.  She tells Derica she doesn't frighten her.  Derica says she will in time, they have such wonderful plans, "we were supposed to rule, but instead, we're exiled here with your filthy herd." They are going to "troll for souls... we're going to break you from the inside."

The Evil plan of Evil.

It'll start small but strange.  Twenty-four hours with no TV, internet or radio. Then they'll bring it back but with videos of what make them laugh. Then a plague of bus crashes around the world, including school buses.  Then dropping plans out of the sky.  So many shots of broken bloody bodies that people will get numb:

Derica: "They won't stop looking, but they won't really do anything will they? You are a spectator society."

The President will give a speech about the need for courage and declaring martial law before putting three bullets in his wife's head.   They creatures won't announce themselves we let humanity think they did it themselves.

As she starts to leave Derica says she's not the first person with the visions, how many people they have pushed over the edge into mental asylums. They did it by going after everyone they loved.   Quickly Astris calls Io and orders each Rook to be guarded by two Bishops and she wants Duncan and Killian around Chloe at all times.  Io has to break the news that Chloe and Killian are missing and Duncan didn't come in today.  All Astrid can say to herself upon hearing that is, "fuck."

In a hospital a doctor is called into a room by a nurse and is greeted by the sight of a man with a horse's head causing him to say "my God".. The nurse then slashes the doctor's throat saying "it's time for the opposition party"  Then the TV's go dead.  Elsewhere The Butcher has come for Duncan, but Duncan has set a trap for him with the three Haverlin brothers armed with baseball bats surrounding the Butcher as he stands before Duncan.

Calmly the Butcher says he thinks he can take all of them, but Duncan has a secret weapon "White Mist", the perfume Astrid wears. He splashes it into the Butcher's faces who screams like it's acid.  Then the Haverlin brothers lay into him with gusto.   After a sound beating which leaves his head crushed and mangled the Butcher cries for mercy.  Unfortunately that's not going to happen and beating round two commences.

Baseball bat time for The Butcher.

Ms Capone, another of Astrid's Rooks is met by two men who say they need to take her to a safe room.  But she blows the head of one who explodes into a monster, she takes it on while also taking a phonecall from Astrid who says she needs her.  Capone finishes off the creature and Astrid tells her to go to her private sick bay "please protect my heart."

We see Anika in bed, she of the half a body belonging to a one hundred year old.  And her loyal caretaker bears down on her saying she has  surprise for her, a secret she's been keeping a long time.  In the Clean Room Artus is ranting about leaving the "bitchcritters somewhere thet don't want to be".  Astrid's mission control, Raven, tells her what's happened and also that there is chaos in the building with several fatalities and some floors lost contact with, "they're here, Astrid.  They're in the building."

Astrid orders an evacuation and that everyone should get home to their loved ones.   She thanks Raven for his service to her and says goodbye to him.  In the sickbay the carer shows Anika the shoe she was wearing when the aliens took her up. She herself "personally supervised what we did to you.  To ruin you.  To rip open your soul."  The carer starts to transform, but gets an axe to the head courtesy of Capone. With the carer dead Capone says they are getting out of here, somehow.

Astrid enters the Clean Room and asks Artus what she can do for him.  He rambles on about the room speaking to him, but now they belong to a "godly man, as they rightly should." If Astrid agrees to be hims and lets him teach her how to behave proper he'll bring the others back.  When he says she ought to know how to cook, that it's the way to a man's heart she scowls and says "is it?  Let's just see."

We begin the next chapter in a normal suburban street, everyone's net and TV's have gone off and people have wandered into the street with an old man noting "there's something wrong with the stars."  Back with what's left of the Butcher who has been taped to a chair so Duncan can question him, he tells them it is going to rain blood.  Then everyone will eat each other alive. 

The Haverlins say that won't happen, people stick together. The Butcher says maybe they will but what about Duncan?  And also Astrid's kingdom is collapsing and she will burn.  Duncan uncorks more of Astrid's perfume and asks what they can do to stop the end from happening.

In the Clean Room Artus tells Astrid his story, that a "wildcat" got the better of him, and he died on the hospital table.  When the doctors saved him he could feel "the gears of the universe grinding all around me".  The Clean Room called to him, it wants him in charge not Astrid.  Astrid says she make him take her to them.  He sneers that this should be interesting.

Artus thinks he's in control...

In Artus's memory, Chloe tells him this isn't real just a thought from his future self.  Artus asks what does that matter?  Chloe says it means they can change things.   She starts to cut the bound and gagged woman free despite Killian saying she can't save someone who is already dead.  Artus jams his revolver into Chloe's back saying he'll be having fun with her.

In the suburban street the people see an old woman with blood all over her front come walking up saying "bad dog.  bad dog."  You love and feed them and then they attack you and she reveals one of her hands is missing.  Back at the Institute Derica's guards have been killed and a man in a hoodie walks over to the hell baby.  It is Mr. Webber.  he says he sculpted his face to please the exalted one, ie: Derica.  Who asks to be taken to see Astrid once last time because she wants to rip her open.  Webber carries Derica away saying "your will be done mistress."

In the street the woman missing a hand has collapsed. Everyone is freaking out and a young boy points at one of the women can yells that he saw her skin change, that she was pink and had claws "she's not human."  Everyone backs away from her as she says it's ridiculous. One of the men whispers to his wife to go fetch his gun sharpish.

In the Clean Room Artus says he's going to take a trip through Astrid's worst memory.  We see young Astrid, still on crutches after the accident that triggered her ability to see the aliens. He father puts a hand on her shoulder, but he's actually a horrific monster. She says she will tell everybody about him, everyone will know the truth.  Her not-dad says who will believe her?  As for her father the  demon hugs her saying, "I ate him, darling.  Right down to his dirty fucking toes."
Artus mocks her and Astrid says that when she was twelve she took a kitchen knife and stabbed the creature twenty-one times.  Artus has one last chance or she'll disassemble him.  He says she doesn't scare him she's just a critter:

Astrid: "Yes.  That's apt actually.  Because sometimes you need a beast Artus.  And I am that beast.  And this room belongs to me."

And she regains control. Artus cowers in front of her and demands he tell her where they are and forces it out of him, "that wasn't so hard was it?"

...he was wrong.

They all end up in Artus's memory.  Chloe is so happy to see Astrid, Astrid says since meeting Chloe she has apologised to three people, intentionally embraced three people and uttered a vulgar curseword aloud, "how could I not come back for you?"

She demands to know from Artus how to kill the entities, he begs her not to make him tell.  With quiet fury she says she will MAKE him remember his death.  Right now his victim is going to stab him and he will die on the way to the hospital, "death is outside and his voice is thunder".  If he doesn't tell her how to kill the entities he will leave him in this moment for all eternity.

With her foot on his face he says "exoduction", the have to  abduct the child entity and then exorcise it.  Unsatisfied, Astrid leaves Artus at the mercy of a black spikey creature and the memory fades away with him trapped inside it.  Astrid, Killian and Chloe are safe back in the Clean Room.

In the suburban street the woman the child accused is being restrained while she protests she's been their neighbour for years.   She has a shotgun pointed at her and the man holding it demands she start talking.  We cut to the child who did the accusing and he's actually a monster himself.  He smirks to himself as three shots ring out telling his sister he's sure they'll be fine.

The Institute is being evacuated, but Avil, Chloe's police detective boyfriend runs inside to find her.  He meets up with several of the faithful who don't want to abandon Astrid, including Mary from the interlude.  In the Clean Room Chloe is a little shocked at Artus's fate at being left alone with his death.  There are moths everywhere. She tells Chloe she can see the entities not because she nearly died but because they reveal themselves to the people in the most pain.

Astrid: "It's grief.  A child in a coma. A woman whose fiance killed himself.. that's there catnip.  It's their heroin."

Chloe says they have to exorcise they child, and Astrid says they'll come to us.  Raven is still in mission control. She asks him to bring them two Earl Grey teas and to play some Chopin while they wait.  He says it would be his honour as he wipes away some tears.

Waiting for the end.

Chloe says that they are coming to kill us and that Astrid knew about this and she let people thing this was just a cult and she was a liar.  Astrid says people would never believe the truth.  She then tells Chloe her most pleasant memory in ages was having barbecue with Chloes boyfriend and friends, "hot dogs and potato salad and an ice cold beer, the night sky overhead.  It was so delicious it felt like my first meal as a free woman."  It was food people east when they can look up and see only stars and not carry those stars on their shoulders.

In Southern California, an automated warning has gone out from Astrid to her "Blue Utopians".  They have a card that will allow them entrance into a nearby sanctuary which is good for two approved persons.  They will be safe but the rest of the world won't be so fortunate.

Derica and Marcus Webber are walking through the institute, with Derica directing Marcus along the way.  Marcus says he worships her kind and waited for her birth.   He mutilated his face to present a more fearsome visage and emulate her race. "Very good.  And you will rip out Astrid Mueller's heart for me, yes?"  Marcus says it will be his pleasure.

Raven brings the tea, he asks if they should be evacutating as the building is on fire.  Astrid says she knows, she was the one who set the fire.  She wanted to to work in isolation with the people she... and she tails off.  "Trust?" says Chloe.  "Yes trust.  Thank you Chloe" says Astrid.  Then she says they're here.

Derica and Marcus are at the door to the Clean Room and Derica unleashes a torrent of vile abuse and threats to get her to open it.  Then Capone appears behind them and opens fire.  Inside the Clean Room, Astrid notes her "splendid loyalty."  Duncan and the Haverlins are also fighting their way through the Institute too battling the creatures as they appear.

Capone is getting beaten up, Killian asks to go out and help her, but Astrid says Capone knows she is expendable. Capone rips off Marcus's bottom jaw, then a knife flashes.  Astrid says it is time to open the door and thankfully the person outside is a battered and bloody Capone with a knife in her stomach.  She collapses over the threshold and Derica walks in past her saying "she killed my creepy pet Aryan".

Capone is severely injured as Derica enters the Clean Room.

Derica says she found her way in.  But Astrid says she actually let her in. She has a Dr Hagen on the phone and she tells him it's time to "blow their goddamn city into the Atlantic Ocean, please."  Hagen tells them he will do so, and from his large boat he fires a huge cannon blast into the sky (this isn't a total deus ex machina, we saw this is book one). Derica demands to know what she did:

Astrid: "Well, it's a bit complicated.  I waited until your mind was elsewhere, you see.  Then I had the worlds horniest genius blow a hole through yur invisible city.  It's going to the bottom of of the sea, I'm afraid."

She then tells Derica to be quiet, and they start to exorcise her by reciting Catholic rites at her.  A huge moster bursts out and says, "don't you try that Catholic shit on me Astrid Mueller! We wrote half that damn book." Then everyone else arrives, Avil, Duncan, the Haverlins.  Chloe is happy to see Avil but she grins at Killian and tells him "you might have to share a bit."

They then reveal the secret weapon they have, which is Spark the good alien.  And as Astrid recites more words of banishment, Spark completes the ritual and sends the being "to before there was time." Astrid tells Spark she may have misjudged him.  She orders Capone get medical attention and the fire get put out.  Chloe tells Astrid, "holy shit, you saved the world.  I'm still a reporter.  People are going to know."  But Astrid says that won't be the case at all.

Spark helps banish Derica to a time before time began.

And so Chloe, on Astrid's orders, became Judas Iscariot. Astrid didn't want Chloe to make her into a deity, she wanted her to destroy her.   Better to tell everyone she was a fraud than demons tried to kill everyone:

Chloe: "So I went on the box and said everything she'd said was a scam, a lie.  That she was a thief and common criminal.  And then I went home and cried for three days. And never quite liked myself again.  Not completely."

Killian and Avil come by and that helps, no one has seen Astrid in over a week.  She started reading Astrid's infamous novel, the one with no punctuation, the one that gives you either total enlightenment or drives you insane. She's halfway through, "can't wait to find out which way I go."  And this brings this volume and the series overall to an end.

I'll comment on the art first because I think losing Jon Davis-Hunt (poached for a higher profile gig I believe) hurt this story quite a lot.  His clinical detailed precision worked brilliantly for the ordered world of Astrid, and although Geovani gives us great monsters, his panels where people are just talking are ill blocked and lacking in detail. Narrative wise, personally I thought all the stuff with Artus dragged the story down.  I'd much rather have seen more incidents of the beginning of the apocalypse instead.  I also didn't like how passive is made Killian either, although I enjoyed Chloe acting on her attraction to her after two volumes of Killian's clumsy flirting.  That said there is still much to recommend here.  We are once again given a very strong female character in Astrid who can smack down serial killers and save the world with practised ease.  And was evern allowing herself to be martyred in the court of public opinion to explain what all the strange goings on where about.  I also would have liked to know abit more about Marcu Webber and how he came to know of the hell baby, his story seemed potentially much more interesting than Artus's.  But I carp on when overall I liked it, liked the different women in it, all badass in their own right and the premuise was imaginative and if there is no more Clean Room which looks likely, it did at least not end on a cliffhanger but wrapped its plot threads up fairly neatly.

Clean Room Book 2: Exile (#7-12) NSFW

NSFW:  Boobs and Pony-man tackle.

"Ugh Earl Grey.  How does she drink this stuff?" - Killian

Time to wrap up this ladies month with a story that stars several lead female characters in a tale of mystery and horror, written by Gail Simone and art by Jon Davis-Hunt.  Now summing up the premise behind Clean Room so far is going to be difficult because were still close to the start of the narrative, things are being put in place that will pay off further down the line so I recommend you check out my post on Book One first.  But in a nutshell we have two main characters, Astrid Mueller who is a writer of horror fiction and since an accident as a child has been able to see monsters preying on other humans.  She has set up her own Scientologyalike cult to figure out what these things are and how to fight them, with the titular Clean Room being used to communicate with and exorcise these beings.  Our other main character is Chloe Pierce who, after attempting suicide in book one greiving the suicide of her boyfriend (a member of Astrid's organisation) who killed himself upon being told the ultimate truth behind Astrid's religion, has found herself being unwillingly groomed by Astrid as a potential ally.  Now she can also see these monstrous beings as well, although her friendship with one who actually saved her from an attack by a third party means things are not as cut-and-dried as it would seem.  So let's continue into the sinister world of the Clean Room.

The story begins with a teenage Astrid visiting a hospitalised girl called Anika Wells.  Anika tells Astrid that she was taken by mysterious beings into a white room, "they ripped me open from above, like I wasn't worthy of their touch".   They felt contempt for her but also liked hurting her.   She also dreamed the same word over and over, "Exoduction".   Astrid looks at the word, "a portmanteau.  How interesting."

Seventeen years later we are back at Astrid's building in Chicago.  She takes a meal into a darkened room.  Inside on hospital bed is Anika, her left side horrifically wasted and withered.   Astrid tells her about Chloe, "tremendous promise. Off the scale."  Anika weakly says Astrid has to let her go, but Astrid says she can't do this without her.

Anika Wells

Back in the past, Anika describes hearing white noise then having her left side peeled open.   Astrid tells her when she was six she was deliberately run over, the driver backed up to do it again.  Since that say, "I've been able to see things others cannot".

Astrid: "I believe these entities... mean to do us harm.  I believe they can hide inside of us.  Do things to our flesh.  And I've been tracking them, Anika.  Starting with my own father."

Then we cut to Chloe Pierce being informally interviewed by Detective Avil Demakos.  He wants to know how much she knew about the death of a man called Michael Parks.  She didn't really know him, just bought him some new socks as he was homeless.  He was found tied in a knot.   She invites him in for tea and asks if she knows of Astrid Mueller. Back with present day Astrid she is getting ready for a private session in the Clean Room.

Chloe and Detective Avil.

We return to Chloe and Avil, he says he knows there have been a rash of suicides linked to her followers.    They chat for a bit and she wonders if she's a suspect.  He says no, he'd checked her whereabouts on the night in question.  Chloe laughs saying "cheeky bastard." Avil smiles and says "That's detective cheeky bastard, if you please."  He wonders why she asked him about Astrid, did she have some to do with the death of her fiancee?  "Not directly, maybe" says Chloe. They contemplate the moon and Chloe refers "horrible things, these shades."

Chloe: "What if we were just in the road when they drove through?  What if we're jaywalkers in a never-ending hit-and-run?  What if we're just...just... road-kill?"

Astrid enters the Clean Room and into a memory of her own, her and her family at church on the day she was hit by the car.  A man in black, comes and sits next to her saying his name is Doctor Potter, "you may know me as the Surgeon".

He tells Astrid he engineered her childhood accident.   They wanted her dead because she would be able to see them, but just ended up unlocking the ability faster.  When Astrid blows him off and makes to leave and this enrages him.   He hands her a bag with a disciples genitals in and says they'll come for her when she is weak, then take all the others who have ever got close to her and with that he leaves.  Astrid shuts off the Clean Room and also leaves gagging for a cup of tea.

The Surgeon and Astrid.

We then cut forwards to Astrid on stage giving her new disciples a talk.  As she does so, her furious lesbian right-hand woman Killian wonders to another employee called Duncan how Astrid gets people hanging on her every word for two grand.  Her head of security a woman called Capone is sweeping the audience when suddenly a man stands up and calls Astrid "Goddamn.  Goddamn daughter of Satan. Goddamn bitch".  Before everyone can react he pulls a gun and shoots Astrid through the torso.

The shooting aftermath.

Capone shoots him in the shoulder as Duncan yells they are going to keep this "in fucking house".  Killian tells Astrid she'll be fine, but Astrid calm scolds her for using "meaningless words of comfort".  She tells to go to her office and follow her instructions there and also bring her Chloe Pierce...

...who is currently out for a meal with Detective Avil, unsure if it's a date or an official interview.  She's told him all about Astrid's goals her organisation and all the weird stuff and wonders why he believes her.  He says that when they untangled the hobo they found he had two right hands.  So yes he believes the weird stuff now. Then Killian phones her and summons her to Chicago.

The injured assassin is being questioned by Capone and he tells her his name is Peter Mueller, Astrid's brother.  A helicopter arrives at Chloe's house where she and Avil had returned to. Her three neighbours, the brothers who keep a look out for her say they are coming too.  Meanwhile Killian uses the threat of losing his "Utopian" status on the best heart surgeon in Illinois to get him to come out to Astrid.  She then goes into Astrid's office alone and starts watching a video Astrid left her if something were to happen to her.

Astrid:  "This next thing might be a bit of a shock. Hell is real and the Devil is coming".

Meanwhile Duncan kisses his male lover and goes outside to deal with the Chicago Police.   When one of the cops starts saying they'll get a warrant for the scene, Duncan whispers that he understands his daughter works in one of their outreach centres in Africa.  And if he doesn't "turn around and leave... you'll never see your daughter again."

Collecting Chloe and friends.

In the helicopter Chloe says she will take one of her neighbours with her before going into the Clean Room.   Everyone else is suited up with Astrid laid out still alive inside the room.  The surgeon says there is nothing he can do.  Upon arriving at the building Avil asks if they'll let him in as a boyfriend rather than a cop and they kiss.  But Chloe brings in Rene Havelin her neighbour, but as she introduces him to Killian she says he actually has someone attached to him.  And we see a monster stuck to the side of Rene's face. "His name is Spark" says Chloe.

Introducing Spark.

While Astrid deteriorates on the table we are introduced to some new characters in Austin Texas, two men running a business called "Perma-seek".   They discuss what has happened to Astrid and one says they must do the "Christian thin" and help her followers, "it's our duty".  In the Clean Room, Killian is holding a gun to Chloe's head for bringing Spark inside.  She pulls back and says she trusted her, Astrid is dying, "everything I care about in the world."

Chloe says she's been seeing monsters everywhere and so is not afraid of Killian's gun.  So Killian uses the Clean Room to make a bigger one.  Astrid stops them arguing and weakly asks why Chloe bought it in.   Chloe explains Spark was "blessed by the church right the fuck out of a young Spanish girl... and he's here now for me." When the Surgeon came for her she survived because of Spark.

Chloe: "I think they gospelled the dark shit right out of him Astrid".

So the plan is that he rides her flesh and puts her back together again.  She asks Spark to say he'll save her but he says "no."  Astrid goes into Vfib and as she begins to die, Chloe pleads with Spark to help.

Then we get a flashback to Astrid seventeen years ago driving through the desert with a couple of friends.  She gets out the can and sees a huge winged thing hovering close by.  The other two can't see it.   Later Astrid finds a bright white spheroid and shows it to her friends, the same one now inside the Clean Room.

Spark does his thing.

Chloe realises Astrids perfume is putting Spark off so they wash it off.  Chloe then reassures Spark they won't hurt him and he reluctantly starts melding into Astrids flesh.   Killian starts to panic but Chloe has her gun and trains it on her while Spark does his thing.  Meanwhile Capone is interrogating Peter who says he did it because "she murdered our father."

Spark finally heals Astrid, but at great cost to himself as he is very weak.  Astrid thanks Spark, then orders 60,000 volts be run through him which leaves him a smear on the floor of the Clean Room.  Astrid asks for some tea and clothes, "I've decided to go on holiday."

We then return to the old men in Texas.  One of them starts changing into a gimp mask and is naked apart from that and an apron.  Their company started with the "idea of selling healthy products to a nation that didn't know they wanted them".   The reason he is getting pervily dressed up is to deal with a couple whose sales quotas have been missed. They are naked and strung out on a rack as the man, Reston Wenuka, says "welcome to the Dark Room my friends".

Incentivising!

Then we cut to Killian watching a TV report about Wenuka offering to help Astrid's flock in their time of need.   Astrid is currently incommunicado and Killian is running things.  Disgusted she tells Duncan to turn it off.  He comments that she is dressing and drinking tea like Astrid.  Duncan asks if Astrid is coming back.  Killian says she has sent someone, because she isn't talking to her.

Up in the mountains of Colarado, Capone gets out of a car and stumbles through the snow finding Astrid sitting outside a lodge quietly contemplating the scenery.   She says to Capone she isn't going back, "I've given quite enough don't you think?"

Astrid:  "Do you know what the worst thing in the entire world is. The worst curse you can inflict on any human being.  The very worst thing?  Seeing the world as it actually is."

Back in Florida Chloe is trying to get ahold of Astrid.  She believes Spark isn't dead and they have him.   She says she never forgive Astrid for caging him in the "shitty room".  She has also been doing some research into Astrid's company and Avil tells her he knows two of the properties and they are empty.

Inside the Clean Room, poor Spark is still alive and being zapped in a laser cage. He is being interrogated, what the nature of his species is, what invasion plans they have.  Spark just whimpers, "Chloe... help Spark."  The interrogators shock him again, "cook this demon piece of shit".

Capone sits with Astrid and asks her how much of the mountain she owns.  Capone goes on to say she lived on a cardboard sheet behind a dumpster.  It was Astrid's message that told her she didn't have to live that life.  She told her taking care of yourself was job one.  She goes on to say, "You never apologise.  You never let anyone else's horsehit stick to you. Where is that woman?"  Astrid says that woman was shot through the heart by her brother and now can't crawl out from behind that dumpster.

Gifts from Astrids organisation.

Chloe is trying to puzzle out why Astrid would own so many empty properties.  Then she hears her car being stolen and she and Avil run outside.  But when they get there a new car awaits, courtesy of Killian who sends her "personal regards".   The unctuous man also hands over an unlimited credit card.  Chloe says she won't forget what they did.  The man says they are gifts not bribes.  He passes on the message that although Killian wants to "fuck you until your legs fall off" there are no obligations attached to the gifts.  She also gets a blue card allowing access to one of their arks, "should the worst occur". The world is going to burn, hell is returning, the card will keep her and one other safe. "Choose wisely".

Killian and Duncan are watching Wenuka on the news, Killian grimly says he's going to worm his way in and destroy everything she built.  What would Astrid do she wonders. Duncan says she'd fight back.

Duncan: "She'd bite and scratch and kick.  She'd hit his groin with a flamethrower.  She'd demolish him Killian".

Killian gives him a hug then sends him home to get some sleep, tommorrow they'll start fighting back.   As Duncan leaves, Killian orders a search into any dirt they can find on Menuka.  Duncan returns home and gets into bed with his boyfriend.

Later Duncan is woken up by the Surgeon.  Duncan says he fed him info once but he won't let him take down Astrid.  But the Surgeon won't take no for an answer and shows him what he did to the last man who rejected him, he turned him into a half human hybrid "Pony man".  He knows he can't get results threatening Duncan directly but his partner, now that's a different story.

More incentivising!

Next day Killian calls Capone for an update on Astrid and also to tell her something about her brother, we don't hear what that is just that it surprises Capone.  Capone then finds Astrid standing on the edge of a cliff, she tells her that her brother has a daughter and "he says she takes after your father."

Killian is rallying a defence against Wenuka.  Duncan is preoccupied but will look into finding out who in Astrid's organisation might be vulnerable to blackmail.  Then Chloe arrives. She comes out and tells Killian her "very dead fiancee... has been showing up at unexpected times"  He's not haunting her but warning her.

Wenuka is chairing a special meeting of Astrid's foundation board members.  He tells them, "if your beloved Ms. Mueller goes psycho, my friends,, who in this group will piss in your followers mouths and tell them it's lemonade?"  One of them saying her taking some time to recover doesn't make her a runaway.  Wenuka says he admires the loyalty, but their ship is sinking "and I don't think any of you boys got the dick to paddle."

Back with Chloe and Killian they are suited up to go into the Clean Room because her dead fiancee has told her bad things are happening in there. Spark is still in there all caged up, Killian sends the others away.  Meanwhile, the news Capone passed onto Astrid has caused her to admit to Capone she was testing her.  One of her "Rooks" has been leaking information, then suddenly Capone pushes Astrid to the ground.

Oh Duncan...

Just outside the Clean Room, Duncan appears and apologetically shoots one of the staff.  Capone had pushed Astrid down because there was a sniper who Capone takes out with her pistol.  Inside the Clean Room, Chloe fusses over Spark, while Duncan follows her and Killian inside. Capone demands to know who sent the sniper as he lies bleeding out.  He says it was Wenuka, he used his wife as blackmail.  Astrid tells him to call him and say he succeeded.  Wenuka announces the tragic news to the board.

Duncan shoots Spark, apologising again saying, "they got me... they'll get you too." Spark tells Chloe he is dying, he tells Chloe she has the power to move the room "anywhere, any-when".  She needs to concentrate on Duncan's pain, Chloe says she can't do it. "Then we all die" says Spark.   Killian and Duncan start fist fighting. Chloe tells Spark they need his darkness back so Spark conjures up a weird bio-mechanical being which slices off Duncan's hand.  Chloe tells Spark to call it off, but Spark grins evilly and says "don't think Spark wants to."

We get another flashback to Astrid twenty-three years ago.   She is in therapy for stabbing her father who is now in a coma.  She tells her therapist she believed her father to be possessed by a demon, who ate his essence, sent him to hell and rides his shell like a toddler rides a bicycle.  Her therapist says they will discuss this more next session.

A monster unleashed.

Back in the present, the monster is running amok in the Clean Room.  Chloe pleads with Spark but he won't stop it.  "It's too late Chloe" he says "Nobody is friends now.  Nobody is friends ever again".  Astrid, Capone and Todd the assassin are back at the lodge. Astrid says he is now under her protection and his wife can come and work for her.  He drops to his knees and thanks her.  Astrid says some people only "shine when they have an opponent" and Mr. Wenuka has provided one.  She has an "invader to decimate" now.

Killian is trying to fend off the bio-mech monster, things are looking bad when Chloe's eyes suddenly roll back and the enviroment inside the room changes.  But they aren't in Duncan's memory, they are in Sparks.  He doesn't want to be here but they go through the church door to where the girl is tied to a bed and being exorcised.

Spark's dark secret.

In Chicago, Wenuka is still convincing Astrid's board that they should join up with his organisation now she's dead. But then the viewscreen flickers on and Astrid appears saying, "I'd like to make a counter proposal."  Inside Sparks memory Chloe is shocked at the state he left the girl in, and worst of all he caused the girl to bite out the throat of her mother.  Killian says they were right to burn Spark, but Chloe asks how many people she killed as she kneels by Duncan's body.

Chloe: "I never believed in sin.  I never believed in repentance.  But Jesus Killian. What if it's all true?"

At the board meeting Weknuka yells at Brother Pete to shut the feed down.  She retaliates by firing the entire board.  She then asks him how a "mediocre little deviant medicine show carnie" got into a postion to challenge her.

She tells him events conspiring to favour him wasn't an accident, and also the loyal soldier at his side isn't what he thinks.  Now that he's failed "they" won't want him to be chatty, and Brother Pete turn into a monster and rips Wenuka's head off. 

Back in the Clean Room the bio-mech is inert.  Killian is about to shoot Spark, but Chloe pleads with him to repair Duncan, "Spark is good boy" he says and does so.   Then the three of them leave, Killian tells security that Duncan was hypnotised by their enemies.  Capone and Astrid discuss what happened.  Capone asked why she didn't take Wenuka out sooner.

Astrid: "The conspiracy you know about is always better than the one you do not".

She then tasks Capone with fetching Todd's wife and to make it look like terrorists got her.  Capone says she'll enjoy that.  Astrid then calls more of her people at her brother's home.  They have found the baby and say it looks normal, but when Astrid looks at it via one one of their smartphones she sees a horrific monster. End of volume two.

Eek!

Another enjoyable read from Gail Simone who has a Garth Ennis knack for dialogue and characterisation. There are several women in this book all with different personalities; the emotionally distant Astrid, the firey Killian, the sensitive Chloe and the no nonsense Capone.  With plots, counter plots and counter, counter plots going on it can be a confusing read at first but I am confident that plot threads will pay off down the line and that Simone is playing the long game here.  The exact nature of the monsters still remains unclear and giving us a "good" one helps muddy the issue further. The fact they show intelligence in doing such things as propping up Wenuka to get to Astrid shows they are not to be underestimated and of course the mysterious Surgeon and his horrific nature give us another particpant to be wary of as he has not given away what he ultimately wants at all.  The art by Jon Davis-Hunt is gorgeous.  Crisp, clean with some fantasticly grotesque monster designs as well as rendering every character unique and sensible, no gratuitous cheesecake here undermining the female characters authority.  Astrid remains a fascinating character, driven albeit someone who keeps her cards close to her chest but not one who has been out-gambitted so far. Chloe is her polar opposite - open, trusting and not afraid to show her emotions.  Astrid seems to see a potential leader in her and it will be interesting to see how things develop along those lines.  All-in-all a fine comic and I am looking forward to the next trade.

Clean Room Book 1: Immaculate Conception (#1-6)

"I hit the shit trifecta.  I lost my fiance.  I lost my baby. I lost my will. Someone owes me. And that thought is keeping me alive" - Chloe Pierce

With the cancellation of the fantastic DCYou comic, Secret Six (again), I'd have not been surprised if Simone had stuck two fingers up at DC and vowed never to work for them again after the way she was treated by them these past few years.  And she is no longer writing superhero comics for DC after a long career doing so (although she has dropped hints on her tumblr lately that she is writing a "big two" character again, so...).  Anyway she hasn't completely cut ties with them as she has created this horror comic for DC's adult orientated Vertigo label.  This comic sees Simone really stretching her writing muscles into a new genre for her, does she carry it off?  Of course she does.  Clean Room is the story of a journalist called Chloe Pierce investigating a not-Scientology-honest style cult called "The Honest World Foundation", one that resulted in the suicide of her boyfriend who was obssessed with the book written by a second rate horror fiction writer Astrid Mueller that functions as the cult's bible.  Chloe is determined to get answers from Mueller about "The Clean Room", a top secret sanctuary for cult members where your deepest fears and worst memories are relived.  Along the way we are treated to some truly disgusting visions of creepy monsters that are somehow linked to the cult, and it allows the artist to go wild with some grotesque designs that are reminiscent of the works of Junji Ito I have covered here previously. The artist is John Davis-Hunt, and I really like his clean, crisp artwork. This is the sort of horror art I'd like to have seen in the Hellraiser books.  But I digress, so lets take a look at the first collected Clean Room trade.

Chloe attempting suicide.

The story begins with a flashback to Astrid as a young girl thirty years ago, going to church in Germany with her parents and brother who is teasing her over her toy bear Klaus.  Nearby two men get into a truck, one of them, a man called Jonas Kemf seems pretty angry about something and when he ends up hitting Astrid (who sees a monster briefly) with the truck, he reverses back over her.  Astrid wakes up in hospital where her parents are watching a news report about Jonas being badly injured when the by-standers took bloody revenge on him, gouging his eyes out we find out later.  Astrid asks to see her papa.  When told he is standing right by her hum, Astrid say:

Astrid: "Mama?  Why is papa's face made of snakes?"

Smash to black. Then we get another flashback, this time to Chloe as she attempts suicide by drowning herself after losing her fiance Philip to a self inflicted gunshot.  She wakes up in hospital, restrained to prevent her harming herself.  Her "rescuers" were the three kindly brothers who are her neighbours.

Chloe: "They pulled me out. I told them I was grateful because I didn't want to make them sad... sometimes the truth hurts the people with the best hearts the most."

She says all the right things to get her restraints taken off.  Then one day a nurse offers her a copy of Astrid's book "The Honest World" saying it changed her life.  Chloe sees blood drip on it then sees a full on hallucination of Philip with half his head gone.  "And after I started screaming, they put the restraints back on, for a while" she recounts.

Chloe has an unwelcome vision of her dead boyfriend.

After she gets out of hospital, she starts digging into Astrid's work and organisation, looking for answers as to why her fiance killed himself.  Once Astrid wrote "poorly regarded horror novels".  Now she is "the most powerful individual in that weird twilight industry between self help and religion."

Chloe goes and finds a homeless man called Mikey who used to be a friend of Phil's.  She tells him she wants to know all about "the Blue Utopians", but Mikey yells at her to leave it and that he has been inside "the Clean Room".  It looks like a room but shows you "everything". 

Mikey: "She says it's for helping.  Just a few questions, right? It's worse than hell.  Worse than emptiness.  I'm afraid of her more than Satan, Chloe".

He pleads with her to leave things well alone.  Astrid took his drugs and now he hears voices all the time.  Chloe leaves him thinking Astrid is "done playing God with people.  Let's see what fucking havoc a journalism degree can really create."

After a month of pestering, she finally sets foot in the Foundation's headquarters.  She isn't going to be speaking with Astrid, but a severe woman called Killian.  Killian greets her and says that she can offer Chloe an exclusive look at the office, but Chloe says the lack of Astrid's signature perfume tells her this isn't her office.

Killian and a very dirty demon.

Killian sits and starts talking to her, but Chloe sees a huge, grotesque monster rear up behind her and drowns out Killian's voice with some filthy sexual innuendo.  Chloe ends up backed away on the floor and it disappears, Killian seems unsuprised at Chloe's recoil.  She calmly says Chloe needs to go to a hospital, she's "unwell".

Angrily Chloe says she wants to see Astrid and the Clean Room now because they are implicated in the death of her fiance.  Killian says she needs to be careful about what she writes.  Chloe responds that journalists "have a way of being sued, broken and destroyed when they write about her."  But you see, Chloe has nothing left to lose.  And then Astrid and her minders walk in, "let's chat shall we?" Astrid says.

Astrid (centre) and minders.

The next chapter begins with a pair of cops investigating a death.  The victim is the homeless man Mikey and he's been tied in a knot. This is odd enough, but the junkie hang out he was found in has been scrubbed clean, no prints, no forensic evidence of any kind.

Back with Astrid and Chloe, Astrid asks how they can fulfil Chloe's "wants".  Killian says she should escort Chloe out of the building, she is a "pre-emotic" and not there in good faith.  Astrid agrees and starts to leave, but Chloe shouts after her:

Chloe: "Why do you have a private cemetary? Why are your disciples discouraged from outside contact?  What are the Blue Utopians Ms. Mueller?"

Astrid pauses then agrees to talk privately with Chloe.  They drink tea and Chloe tells her about her fiance's suicide after following her cult.

Astrid asks how selfish she thinks her grief is.  Does she find that people speak highly of her dead fiance?  Chloe says yes they do and she feels like she is not allowed to be angry at him. Then the questions take a weird turn, Astrid asks if she misses his erection and how long was it before she masturbated after his death. Then Chloe sees the obscene talking monster again. Astrid takes a hold of her and asks her what she sees, Chloe lies and says she didn't see anything.

Another filthy fiend vision.

Astrid then shows her the chessboard she has which has a varient of chess on it, it involves more rooks than usual and they are turned upside down.  "The inverted rook is called a Wazir and is only allowed to move one space at a time.  Barely stronger than a pawn".  Then she agrees to let Chloe into the Clean Room.  Chloe is completely decontaminated, right down to having her labial piercing removed and dressed in jumpsuits she and Astrid go inside.

Inside is a patient called Walter Fennister.  He's been having trouble sleeping.  Astrid keeps questioning him and he admits that he can't sleep because he is afraid.  He's afraid of "the White Monkeys" which his mother told him would come and eat his penis even if he just touched it to pee.  And after it grew back, they'd eat it again.

Then suddenly the white room is replaced by the image of a graveyard.  Chloe thinks she is hallucinating, while Astrid mercilessly forces Walter to admit that he wanted a pair of children to touch his penis and when they refused he killed them by slashing their eyes out.  "Why are you making me remember all this?" he says angrily.  Then the graveyard recedes and they are back in the white room.

Inside a memory in the Clean Room.

Astrid tells him to sleep well.  Chloe is outraged that she is letting a child murderer go. "I'm afraid that is not my jurisdiction.  He is clean" says Astrid.  Chloe swears she'll bring the organisation down and marches out, Astrid says to herself that she was hoping they could be friends.  Later that night, the White Monkeys come for Walter and as they attack his screaming form we cut to Astrid saying, "Sleep well Mister Fennister. Sleep well".

We then jump forwards to another session in the Clean Room.  Astrid has an assisstant called Terry this time and they are going to be treating a man Joe Wei.  Terry is unsure why, the man is a "Frell" who registered nothing on the "meter".  Astrid merely responds that "Everyone's a nobody Terry.  Until they are not."

Time for another "patient".

Joe Wei has a strange problem. He doesn't like to step on the ground and only allows himself to take one hundred and seventy one steps a day. He lost his wife over this obsession, "she couldn't take the counting". He says heaven isn't in the sky, it's on the ground and every step you take is "walking on the screaming faces of the angels."

Then we cut to Chloe's house.  Someone or something has broken in. Her three neighbours go in and confront the person as to what they think they are doing in there.  The person has it's back to them and just goes, "Booooop".  Meanwhile Chloe is angrily filling her car with petrol at a filling station, still furious over her experience in the Clean Room.

Back in the Clean Room, the room receedes and is replaced with an image of the countryside, with Mr. Wei fishing, then we see the trauma that ruined his life.  He was abducted by aliens.  At Chloe's house the creature who broke in reveals himself to have a horrible, wicked witch style face and he beats up the three brothers and throws one through the window before leaving.

The mysterious intruder.

At the petrol station, Chloe's card has been refused.  The station attendant tries to extort a sexual favour out of her to pay for her gas, but then suddenly Killian appears and breaks his arm, before tossing him some money onto his prone body.  She then invites a gob-smacked Chloe for ice cream and waffles.

In the Clean Room Joe Wei is being shown having experiments performed on him.   Astrid says she wants to see who is doing this to him. At the cafe, Killian is tucking into her ice-cream and waffles, Chloe isn't so keen.  She thinks the organisation got her credit card stopped because they are "stropping" her, which is how they deal with threats to them. Killian says the road she is on doesn't go anywhere good and she has a proposition for her:

Killian: "We grab two bottles of whatever passes for wine in this redneck rodeo.  We find the nearest hotel with the fewest bugs.  And then we fuck 'til our brains fall out."

Unsurprisingly Chloe doesn't take her up on this offer, then a news report comes onto the TV in the cafe with a story of an actor called Rand Tanner who has been found dead by his own hand.  As he was considered one of Astrid Mueller's success stories, this is bad news for the organisation and Killian takes her leave of Chloe to go do some damage control but not before telling her she finds her "obscenely attractive".

Bad news for the Foundation.

She leaves a confused Chloe mumbling "what just happened?" and Killian screams down the phone that Astrid needs to be pulled out of the Clean Room now.   But Astrid is having a breakthrough with Joe Wei, when she demands to know if there is anyone else inside him she should address, he gouges his eyes out and says "it's Jonas Kemf Astrid. How are the legs?"

Jonas Kemf takes over the luckless Joe Wei.

Fifteen years ago in Norway, Astrid visited an inventor called Doctor Hagen, who is something of an eccentric.  She asks him to build her a "Cloudbuster".  His payment will be a man and a woman stripped naked, who will stand and let him appreciate their nudity for one hour a day although he can't touch them, "do we have a deal Doctor?"

Back in the present, as Killian flies back to HQ she rages at the news coverage of Rand Tanner's death.  Another woman called Capone says she can shut the reporter up.  But Killian says she has other ideas of what Capone, a "rook" now can do. And it needs to be something drastic as people are turning in their memberships at their outreach centers in large numbers.

Killian calls Chloe, hoping to get her to agree to help them.  She'll get her interview with Astrid, her "pick of the jobs" just so they can get a fair message out.  They'll be her best friends in that case.

Chloe: "Fuck you. Fuck your favour. And fuck Astrid fucking Mueller."

"She's thinking it over" says Killian to Capone.  "Clearly" says Capone drily.  Chloe arrives back home to find her neighbours alive, though looking rather beaten up.  They tell her about the... thing they found in her house.  Chloe tries to warn them off helping her again but they say they always will because they are her neighbours.

Chloe's neighbours refuse to stop looking out for her.

Back in the Clean Room Jonas is taunting Astrid, who doesn't rise to his bait.   She asks what his real name is, he says there was a whole section in the library of Alexandria about him, but he made them burn it.  Back at Chloe's house she gets an ansaphone message from the paper she works for saying she's been let go.  This saddens Chloe.

Chloe: "I was so proud the day I got that job.  Screw Superman, I always wanted to be Lois Lane".

Suddenly she hears a voice asking her where all her knives are.  She checks the kitchen drawer and none are in there.  The voice tells her to check the bathroon and all the knives are in the bath standing point up.

Umm.. Ew.

Back in the Clean Room, Jonas grabs hold of Joe's face and pulls it until it is upside down and he is speaking through an eye socket.   He says that her making the Clean Room impregnable was a challenge and that the only way "for one of us to get in... is if you invite us in".  He threatens Astrid and Terry in a panic, shoots him in the face.  Astrid's calm demenour breaks:

Astrid: "Do you know what you've done, you imbecile?  You've doomed us all Terry.  You've killed us all."

Back at Chloe's house she asks the voice if he is with Astrid's people.  It says no it's "one of the others."   Chloe asks what it wants, and looming behind her it says, "I'm supposed to help you kill yourself."

Joe/Jonas "killed" by Terry.

At the cult's HQ, Killian is still fretting about the negative publicity around Rand Tanner's suicide. She wants Astrid pulled out of the Clean Room, but Astrid has more important things to be dealing with.   Since Terry shot and killed Joe Wei/Jonas Kemf she's been waiting, saying Jonas is "house hunting".

In LA, an actress called Chrissy settles into a relaxing jacuzzi. Much to her surprise she is joined by Capone.   Capone lays out the terms of the blackmail they are going to subject Chrissy to.  That she is pregnant with Rand Tanner's child (even though she barely knew him and it's her fiance's kid), and that this will help Astrid out of a pickle, even though Chrissy isn't a member of the organisation. But it's a two-way deal, if Chrissy plays along, she'll have her pick of film roles. Her fiance will have to go, but that appears to be a sacrifice Chrissy is willing to make as she reluctantly agrees (not that she had much choice).

Another possession as Spark inhabits one of her neighbours.

Chloe wakes up on her bed having passed out at the reveal of the monster who is supposed to help her die.  It admits it couldn't bring itself to kill her and that it's appearance is distressing her so it possesses the body of one of her kindly neighbours, Rene Haverlin.

In the Clean Room, another possession takes place.  This time Jonas Kemf finds a new home inside Terry. He asks her what time it is, then tells her:

Jonas/Terry: "It's harvest time Astrid Mueller.  Harvest time in the meat hospital. For every last fucking one of you vermin."

Astrid says she's going to walk out of the room right now, but Jonas says he can't allow it.  So Astrid calls the people monitoring the session for Terry's "lifebox".  Meanwhile more bad news over Rand Tanner's death, every Hollywood member is cancelling their "reading" that week.

Chloe wakes up having passed out again. The being inside Rene called Spark suddenly gets serious, he tells her she has to run, that "he" is coming.  But it's too late, and we see the back of a man coming up to her door.

In the Clean Room, Terry/Jonas point Terry's gun at Astrid saying he wants to enjoy this.  Astrid, unruffled says:

Astrid: "Prohibido tirarse de cabenza.  And Maddy Rivera's first two-piece".

This transforms the Clean Room into a swimming baths and we see Terry's worst nightmare play out.  When he was a teenager he was minding his younger brother at the swimming baths. Distracted by Maddy Rivera's skimpy bathing suit he didn't stop his brother diving into the too shallow pool and breaking his neck.

Terry's worst memory activated.

She tells the distressed Terry/Jonas that she doesn't choose Rooks for their invulnerability.  She needs a way to break them if needed, she leaves "a crack in the tea-cup." Confronted by an image of his dead brother, Terry falls screaming to his knees, Jonas gone from him.  Astrid calls for medical quarantine and also for a suitable replacement for his position.

There is also good news that Chrissy has gone public with her pregnancy supposedly being Rand Tanner's baby. The celebrity's are back on board and Killian sardonically notes their "flu must have cleared up. A goddamn regular miracle cure."

Terry lies curled up on the floor of the Clean Room, he mutters "It's all over Astrid.  The surgeon is coming.  Everything is falling.  Everyone is falling".   At Chloe's house,Rene/Spark tells her the surgeon is here and they have to go, "he's like a hurricane of wrong.  The things he'll do.  His tools..."  But Chloe is defiant, she needs to know what is going on, why Philip killed himself, so "Rene" touches her forehead and shows her.

Philip has the truth revealed to him.

We then get a flashback of Philip receiving a memory stick with a message from Astrid on it. It will play once, then delete.  As a level-5 "post-Emotic" he is going to be told the true history of the world.   She says that after her childhood accident she could see parasites riding people.  They are everywhere and there is more, but her voice fades out and we just see Philip's increasingly distressed reactions.  When it is over, he takes out his gun and blows half his head off saying to himself, "I'm sorry Chloe.  Turns out I didn't want to know."

Astrid asks Terry where the Surgeon is, and he says he's with Chloe. And when she answers the door it is to a pleasant and friendly looking old man, who politely tells her he's put them in a "pretty pickle" and may he come in?  He tells Chloe he was one of the doctors who first treated her when she tried to commit suicide.  He tries to convince her she is just having delusions and touches her hand saying he can get her into hospital for some aftercare.

Astrid gets annoyed with Killian who should have been keeping an eye on Chloe.  The Rand Tanner situation was "nothing".  Chloe agrees to go with the Surgeon and goes into the bathroom to get some things. But she arms herself with two knives from where they had been left in the bath.  Astrid rushes to contact Dr. Hagen, as Chloe, egged on by a monstrous vision, stabs both knives into the Surgeon's head.

An impressive No Sell there.

Astrid asks if he has finished his Cloudbuster, he has but hasn't tested it.  Astrid says can he aim it?  Hagen says yes. The knives in the Surgeon's head don't affect it, but he does drop his kindly facade and attacks Chloe. Rene/Spark then hits the Surgeon hard enough to break his neck, but this doesn't slow him down and he and Chloe start to run.

Chloe's phone goes and it is Astrid who asks to speak to the Surgeon.  He tells him to leave Chloe alone, she has a Cloudbuster and it is pointing directly at his home "somewhere directly above Barcelona, isn't it?"  She says if he doesn't leave Chloe's now she pull the trigger on his existence.  So the Surgeon retreats for now.  "What are you?" asks Chloe as he leaves.

The Surgeon: "Are we aliens or demons, is that what you mean Chloe Pierce? Overlords or Angels? We are none of those things.  We are inmates".

And with that he is gone.  We finish this volume with Chloe, her three neighbours, Astrid, Capone and Killian all at Philip's graveside.   Chloe asks why Astrid sacrificed her weapon for her.

Astrid: "Because you access the dead.  I know you do.  I can lose a Rook Chloe.  I cannot lose a Queen".

Chloe starts to tear up at the realisation all of Astrids horrible theories are true.  Astrid asks if she wants a hug and gets Killian to do it for her. And it ends with Chloe thinking with determination that "this is nowhere near over."

So many questions, can't wait for the answers!

This is a fantastic series right out of the gate.  It sets up compelling mysteries, peoples it with fascinating characters and garnishes it with the kind of assured, naturalistic dialogue Gail Simone has a gift for.  We're given several strong female characters, all crucially strong in different ways, from the icily calm Astrid, to the firey Killian to the determined, brave and vulnerable Chloe.  The concept of The Clean Room is a clever way to get some real body horror going, impeccably drawn by Jon Davis-Hunt and we've already been shown that the monsters of this series are going to come in many shapes and forms and not all of them bad guys either. There is an interesting layering to the organisation Astrid runs, while on the surface it's very much a Scientology alike cult, Astrid herself seems to have more nebulous and so far mostly unrevealed motives for why she set it up, she seems to have identified a world full of monstrous threats and is using her organisation as a cover for fighting them.  People who find out the full truth it seems either ascend to the cult's higher eschelons or like Philip, kill themselves once the repercussions of their new knowledge sinks in.  With Chloe and Astrid in an uneasy truce, the story has new impetus and places to go and I am very much looking forward to the next collection.